Nuke ‘em
Today, as part of my campaign for president, I would like to explain my policy about using nuclear weapons.
Use ‘em. Nuke the bastards.
At the moment, we have problems with North Korea, Afghanistan, and Syria. I might want to include some other trouble spots. But the nukes will never fall on any of the cities. We don’t need fallout. Instead, let’s detonate some small nukes in space above them. This will create EMPs. The result—anything plugged in or having computer chips will fry.
The expression “nuke them back to the stone age” might be considered. But it’s more likely their technology will go back to the 1800s. Afganistan is the possible exception since much of their society is still in the 18th century.
So what would be the result? Russia won’t attack because we’ll have a BIG nuke over Moscow. The moment they attempt to launch, we’ll fry their electronics making attack impossible. We owe China so damn much money, their economy would collapse.
But the main thing is that after this, nobody will fuck with us.
President Merkin Muffley: General Turgidson. it is the avowed policy of our nation never to strike first with nuclear weapons!
Gen. Buck Turgidson: Well sir, I would say that General Ripper has already invalidated THAT policy!
— Dr. Strangelove
